Relationship patterns are established early in life. Our parents, role models, friends, etc., influence how we view ourselves and others and have an emotional impact throughout our lives. For example, the way you treat others is influenced by the way your parents acted toward each other. If we never examine these patterns we tend to repeat them, no matter how unhealthy they are. You can probably identify several examples in others’ lives where you observe repeated dysfunctional behaviors, and you wonder why they keep happening. Identifying your own patterns is a significant step in helping you to choose relationships where you support others and they support you in a mutually beneficial give-and-take.

Relationship Patterns

Write about patterns you learned early in life that affect your relationships today. _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ The depth and quality of your recovery is enhanced by the depth and quality of your relationships.

Reviewing Your Current Relationships

It is important to take inventory of your current relationships so you can identify those that will help or hinder your quest for balance. We encourage you to assess your current relationships and alter or let go of unhealthy associations and focus on healthy relationships with people who are sincerely interested in your well-being.

Assessing Relationships

Make a list of all the significant relationships in your life. _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ Now review your list and place each relationship into the following categories. BALANCED AND SUPPORTIVE vs. IMBALANCED AND DETRIMENTAL _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ _______________________________ If you were able to choose someone to assist you in your pain recovery, what would he or she be like and why? _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ This blog post is an excerpt from Pain Recovery – How to Find Balance and Reduce Suffering from Chronic Pain by Mel Pohl, MD, FASAM, Frank Szabo, LADC, Daniel Shiode, PhD, Robert Hunter, PhD; Published by Central Recovery Press (CRP).